Sometimes a song comes on, and it takes you back to “used to.”
The way the sun used to peaked through your room, offering hope, glory, and anticipation in your innocent world. The way that you used to sing first thing in the morning, and piss your cousin off, giving her nightmares about being her eternal alarm clock.
The way in which summers meant going back home to your 35-degree cosmopolitan city in the east, which you were so used to, and still are; or, at least, want to be.
The way that family reunions used to be home.
The way you used to laugh with your beautifully immature cousins over the stupidest things because you were the family’s comics, and 11, and free.
The way you used to be a “nerd” for the first few years of high-school, but also the way you used to be happy, head-shakingly trying to moonwalk in your private moments.
The way your circle used to be small, but also the way it was safe, it was pleasant. The way you used to be young, innocent and unaware of any pain. What is pain?
Sometimes a song comes on, and it triggers certain sensations, a warmth, a light, a scent; That scent of cement when graced with water; and all of them combined make you realize that it’s okay to go back to “used to” in some ways. Growth is great, but part of it means taking the right steps to go back to a form of “used to” that fits your happiness now, of course if “used to” ever was happy. Maybe the right song is all you need to realize that life is good; Life is o.k. If you look through and behind the veil of distractions that reside only in your head, all those things that “used to” are still there and they’re waiting for you to return their love. “Used to,” is the core, and momentary figments of glitter can never surpass your core. So I guess I’m saying, it’s cool for me to be inspired towards taking a step back to that alluring vision of “used to.”